I did a video on this topic, so if you understand German you can watch that. For those that don't, I have written this article. I did also improve on some points and made them clearer with better examples, so might still read this after watching the video.
Each and every one of us experiences the same thing. Every so often things just go wrong. Either we are the one making a mistake or some other unfortunate event takes place that is beyond our control. Maybe you dropped your phone and it broke. Or you had an accident of some kind. And we we feel tons of negative emotions towards those things: anger, sadness, possibly doubt. We regret doing something or we just wish things were different than they are. We think if we did just one thing different things wouldn't have went that way.
We have to realize that it is a given that things like that happen for every single one of us. So then you might ask yourself how to best deal with those occurrences. We have to deal with it some way, there's no way around it.
The most basic concept you have to understand is that whatever you concentrate on, will grow. Whatever the light of consciousness shines on, will increase and get bigger, more significant. It is like the sun. Where it shines to, life will blossom. Without the light nothing will grow, nothing can exist. And you have a beam of consciousness to your free availability. You are the gardener of the world around you. It is up to you what is important to you and what you wish to plant and nurture.
However, most people are not in control of deciding what they focus on. They do not even know of this huge power of theirs, which was given to them. Instead they are controlled and held hostage to their psychology, to their lowest instincts and compulsive reactions.
One very important thing to add is that there is no negation to consciousness. You can not imagine something not to be a certain way. That is the biggest mistake most of us make. I'm not saying blame them. No one taught it to them. But I am teaching you now and it is very important for this understanding to spread.
Imagine being afraid of having a car accident and wanting it not to happen. What is your thought content? It is the imaginary accident you're afraid of. There is no way to imagine the opposite of it. So if you have this fear or anything of that kind, the way you should go about it is to imagine how you wish things to go. Imagine having a great ride and having a fun experience at your destination. Think it through and imagine it in fullest detail. You are shining your stream of consciousness onto that reality and making a conceptual groove. If you can imagine something and think it through it becomes easier for reality to go that path. But most of the time we think of exactly that thing we don't want to happen. I think you can spot the problem. We are carving a way for things to go wrong.
Back to Acceptance
You might ask yourself how that fits in with acceptance. And didn't I say in the beginning that there is not way around things going wrong? Correct. Imagine you stumble and get hurt. You are in all that pain and a lot of thoughts rush through your mind: "Why always me??", "Ouch! That hurts so bad! This is the worst pain ever.", "What a shitty day, if it already starts like that." You are rejecting what is and concentrating on your suffering and how bad things are. When we do this - like you learned before - we increase the intensity of the things we focus on. If you concentrate on it hurting so much, you are increasing the pain. If you think of it being a shitty day, it will become exactly that. The truth is you could have done nothing differently and the pain will be over soon. Well in some situations not soon, but it will be eventually. That's the advantage of impermanence.
So a better way to approach this would be thinking: "Ok, well that happened. It will be over soon. Things will get better." Sure there will still be pain and, possibly if you fractured something there will be longer consequences and restrictions in your life. But it is the present moment and it is the way it is. There is nothing you can do about it, you can not reverse it. But: You have one degree of freedom. And that is how you react, how you see it and what you think of it. Essentially, you have the freedom on what perspective you shine your light of consciousness on. And that makes all the difference.
All of this dualistic reality is the potential for good and bad. It is always the potential for both opposing sides as those were created by splitting unity. Both exist in equal amount and every single situation has the potential to be viewed in a positive or in a negative light. And which of those sides you see is your decision. And it has big impact on your reality. If you decide to view getting hurt in a negative way it will be just that. Let's say you actually fractured your ankle, you might think: "Great, now I can't go to that event I booked two years in advance." or "I can't even walk anymore, how am I supposed to live like this??" Sure, those might be valid thoughts, but it fills your mind with all this negative energy. You reject what is and you think of all the bad impact this event has. This becomes your reality and it is not a pleasant one.
You can not change what happened, but you can change how you see it. And we usually think that a thing like this has to feel bad. But the part that actually causes you to have such a bad experience is you judging it, labeling it as bad, and rejecting it. The event is exactly that what you decide to see in it. So a much better approach would be to look for optimistic reasons why it might have happened and what you can make out of it. You can also see that exactly those experiences are the ones you truly grow from. Actually, being limited in some way makes you be creative. It forces you to think of other ways to do your everyday tasks. This makes you more flexible and keeps you younger. Having a restriction like that or taken away something from you also makes you appreciate that thing much more, once you have it back. It makes you think of all the things you have, that others might not have. I every aspect of you life there is appreciation to be found. Being thankful for all the things you have and are able to do makes you much more happy - without the need to own more. You see, things like those give you an opportunity to change how you see your life. And that indeed changes you reality. But i goes even much beyond that. Other people get infected by your positive view on life and this energy spreads.
But for that to work you need to accept what happened. As long as you reject it your life will be worse and you have all these negative thoughts and feelings. But as soon as you accept it and see that there is a reason for everything and that there is the possibility to see everything the positive way, you open the gate to transforming your life completely. All just depends on how you view it and what you make out of it. So you see that those "bad" occurrences are actually your true chance to grow and become happy.
[continuation coming soon]